Monday, February 21, 2011

Being Told You Suck

There is nothing like starting out your morning right with your project started for a studio class.  There is also nothing like arriving to class to be told that it looks like a craft.  (Which translates too, this is crap.)  Now okay, I'll admit that my structure was made with popsicle sticks and hot glue.  But the professor made it seem as if it would be left that way.  As in my project was the structure and thats it.  Its going to be covered in fabric, no one will be able to tell.  Bleh.

I know my professor was trying to help me out, so nothing against her, but its such a down feeling.  The assignment is to make a fibers project out of a lyric/line of a poem we choose.  I chose "In you I taste God" and I'm relating it to how death has brought me both closer and farther away at times from Him.  I wanted to make something like a yartzit candle holder where the flame inside the candle will illuminate the fabrics.  But I'm having serious problems with the concept and bringing it through.

Fibers is difficult.  My professor kept asking me what seemed like annoying questions about every little piece of material used in the piece.  I just wanted to say, why does it matter!  Come on its for construction, no one will see it!  But thinking about it, it makes a lot of sense that she wants me to think about the materials I use.  I mean with fibers the choice of materials tells the audience what its about.  Every little choice like that counts towards the concept of the piece.  But I will stand by though that its definitely frustrating.

Maybe I should choose a different lyric.  Bleh.  We'll see after I work on it more.

Friday, February 11, 2011

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

New Painting Studio

The photo to my left is what drives me to insanity, 日本語の宿題。(Japanese homework.)  En serio this stuff is intense.  I will stand though that its not as tough as my Spanish translating training, yet.
So let's just say after a week of non stop Japanese projects, quizzes, and tests (might I add I have some due tonight too...) I needed to do something else.  So the following paintings are what came out tonight.

Heads up the music was Smashing Pumpkins opening with Ava Adore.  I worked on this piece first, then the next and last one.
The one to the left is supposed to have a mouth, that's not part of the painting.  I'm not making a statement about censorship.  Just trying to fix a mouth I messed up on.

This one has changed quite a bit throughout the process.  First it was more warm tones, then a purple background with red hair, now its this.  If I find photos of it before I will post them, but I'm not sure where they are....

Word

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Final Review of Class and Project

So for my final project my actual means of presentation changed a lot before the final product.  Working with the idea I had with my project, I began questioning how I would actually present it to the class.  Website?  Power point presentation?  Me just talk with images on the screen?  Then I saw Prof. Rothrock's blog and noticed she had emphasized letting the work speak for itself, I realized I probably needed a different way.

The cool thing is, days before I began working on the final piece I had an idea about a child's story about memories.  Since Dana passed away and left her son, I've been kind of struggling with the idea of how he will have to deal with everything that has happened.  When he went the funeral he wanted to move around and go play.  I'm almost certain as a four year old he had absolutely no idea what was happening and how final it was.  Weeks afterwards he was still asking when Dana would come home.  So I wanted to transmit the memory concept I had before in a way a child might be able to perceive it.  (Not sure if I succeeded, honestly I think I'd need children to look at it to know for sure.)  But I am happy with how it came out.

















Also, I like the way I presented it for a story idea.  Using a basic website lets the user interact and choose the page they want to go to and take their time reading whats provided.  When I get better at websites, I could add in even more interactivity, letting viewers submit memories through a forum.  That's kind of what the box that I collected memories in was for.  I got caught on the 'no talking about your project rule' and the limited amount of time we had, so I didn't go into it.  (Also none of the other student asked so I guess they weren't too interested?  Or maybe they forgot?)

 FINAL EVALUATION OF THE CLASS
I extremely enjoyed this class.  Honestly I feel like I've grown a lot as an artist while taking it.  Between Contemporary Art History and Concepts, I've had to think, a lot, about what I'm doing and learn a lot about different artists and their means of doing things.  I don't think I necessarily sharpened any skill making skills like drawing, painting, etc, but I do feel like my steps to think BEFORE starting those processes has extremely changed and improved.  I'm really glad this class is required for art majors, it seems like an extremely important one.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

New Project, Clearer Ideas

So for my last project I am going to do a proposal for a project.  The project would require gallery space and a lot of work so that is why I'm doing a proposal for it rather than doing it.  The project would be called Memories: Closed.  The project would be looking at memories and how they affect us.  How traumatic or hurtful ones can cause us to try to seal ourselves off from ever repeating the same mistakes or experiencing the same painful sensation.  However with trying to avoid experiencing that pain again we end up missing out on new memories that could be good, or we trap ourselves with those old hurtful memories.

Memories: Closed would be part performance and part gallery show.  Located in the gallery would be a large wooden trunk, one that is large enough for a person to fit in.  Surrounding the trunk would be tapestries with digital art and images of past memories.  Some of the images would be normal photographs taken in good times but blurred a bit or altered to show memory affects.  Maybe even bring up the contrast and bright colors some to stress how we exemplify the good memories, sometimes making them better than they even were because that's how we remember them.  (And vice versa for the bad memories.)  Then leading up to the trunk would be more disturbing images, more grayed or blurred images much like my dreams after my best friend died.

On opening night the trunk would be opened.  The viewers entering the gallery could look inside the trunk and see that there are hundreds of snapshots or written down memories on paper in it.  At some point the performer would enter the gallery with all of the images everywhere and look to one of the tapestries with brighter memories.  They would rip the tapestry off of the way and then take it into the trunk.  Afterward they would lock themselves inside of the trunk and a sign would be hung on the outside saying MEMORIES ONLY.  (The trunk would be designed to let the person breathe comfortably because they would stay there for the rest of the show.)  Underneath the area where the performer yanked down the tapestry would be a space to reflect a projection off of.  The projection would start up with animations/video/images about the performer's memory, all skewed because memory is never as accurate as we like to think it it.

The action of the performer locking themselves in a trunk full of snapshots is a metaphor for when people lock themselves in their own minds with memories.  Getting stuck in them its hard to move on and see that there is still the present and future.  

The next part I'm not sure about, but is a possibility:
The trunk would have a slit on the side and there would be paper and pencil somewhere in the gallery with instructions to write down a memory and put it in the trunk.  That way viewers could become participants and share a memory.  The instructions would read something like:  "Share a good memory and I'll share in the happiness of that day."  Or "Share a sad memory and I'll weep with you."  Or even, "Share in an unimportant memory and we'll make it important."  Just something to make it more interactive and so people won't just be walking into the performer's memories.  Kind of like crossing memories, joining them, bringing new light to them, etc.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

New Project

Looking forward to the new project I'm excited and nervous.  I spent almost two hours on and off writing directions for the next project.  At the time I was set on a video.  Looking at identity once again.  Examining aspects of my identity.  Last time I feel like the painting I did had a lot of parts of who I am, but not going deep enough.  Something that I've realized during the past five months is my ability to use escapism for everything.  I use it for thoughts, relationships, friendships, family complications, medical, etc.  Instead of facing problems I find a way to escape it and I feel like my first project was just that.  Instead of showing me, I showed the wall I use to keep others out.  So I wanted to delve a bit further.

But delving further is straight up hard.  Literally I have pages of scenes and what I want to focus on for the film.  But when I went to record some, looking at the footage I didn't like it.  The ideas were very similar to what I used to do in high school with friends, but without another person to help film it doesn't feel right.  I was considering possibly going back to Fayetteville to shoot it and recruit some friends to do it, but then I realized almost everyone will be away until after the semester ends.

So I think that particular film idea is out.  Its okay because it was starting to depress me and that's a great way to ruin a project quick.  My next idea came to me in biology class today.  We've been studying installation and performance artists lately in Contemporary Art History lately.  (Which I have right before my biology class.)  I was listening to a lecture on pathogens when I started doodling a space.  I was thinking about what I would do for my senior exhibit for Digital Media.  (Even though its not til a year from now.)  And I was thinking what would be funny.  Then I thought what if I brought in a trunk like object that a human could fit into.  I could put two tapestries on either side of the trunk, hanging from the ceiling like curtains.  The tapestries would have digital images I've made printed on them, kind of like a hazy collage of photos of friends/digitally manipulated photos/artwork/etc.  (Much like the digital art printed tapestries Jeff Murphy uses.)






 The surrounding images are basically an example of photo manipulations I'd use.  They are all images of me because that's what I feel comfortable displaying at this point.  I'd also use plain photographs from my past, but I would blur these and probably gray them out depending. 
But yeah, my idea for this project is a proposal for this idea.  Something that I feel like our art department doesn't prep us for is leaving the university and what we will have to do once we leave.  I mean your last semester you finally make a business card and possibly a website.  You're supposed to all of a sudden become established artists in one semester?  But that gets onto a different rant.  My point is if any students are looking towards doing residencies after college they need to start researching them as soon as possible.  I still have a year and a half but I'm starting now.  And I'm trying to think of what I want my 'statement' to be.

For this project my statement would surround memory.  I don't want to give away too much, especially without illusrtations, but the trunk would be used in a performance piece opening night.  Once that night is over it would be used as a tool to expand and evolve the art piece.  Meanwhile in the gallery memories would be spread throughout it.

Cycle

I think Cycle went really well.  I'm really glad I had a groupmate who I worked well with because that seemed to be a problem that appeared in other groups.  Honestly when group projects are announced I normally dread it because I tend to be one of the people who drag along the group.  But this project wasn't like that at all.  Our work dates, editing, communication, everything went really well. 

I would like some critic on Cycle though.  The class was very supportive and asked interesting questions, but there were no suggestions on what could have been better or more interesting.  I know the sound could definitely be adjusted.  During the critic one of the speakers gave off a terrible white noise which isn't on the original footage.  Its a good lesson to check videos on the speakers you'll present them on before showing it.  In a classroom setting it was okay I suppose, but imagine going into an interview or proposal with faulty sound. 

If I had to critic the video we made I'd ask if it was edited to be too corny.  Like those news segments or documentaries that are created with the intent to induce a certain emotion.  I really hope it wasn't like that.  I would also ask if anyone got a message from it, or understood it, etc.  Basically, what do people get from it when they watch it?

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Monday Nov. 22nd's Class

Monday Arielle and I worked on the performance piece for our most current project.  We did go with the idea I mentioned in an earlier blog about the cycle of group homes.  Arielle did the performance and I documented it.  We thought it was appropriate for her to do the performance part because she actually grew up in and out of group homes.  Even though I had friends who went in and out of them, I never experienced it firsthand so we thought it was a good conceptual choice.

Here are some shots that were taken at the performance site:





Jennifer Wallace and Final Piece

I really enjoyed the class when Wallace came by and spoke to us.  I've been thinking about the different exercises she had us do in class, for instance making a repetitive sound, saying a word oddly over and over, making a traveling motion you constantly do, etc and trying to think if I can incorporate it into a work I do in the future.  Its definitely something I've been thinking about for my final project.  Still not sure entirely what I'll do but I am leaning towards video and the concept of identity.  Kind of like a throw back to our first project but a bit deeper or concentrated, not sure.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Gomez-Pena Temple of Confessions & Alfredo Jaar

Alfredo Jaar

Last year I saw Alfredo Jaar speak at UNCC.  I really liked his message.  He was addressing political issues he felt strongly about and finding ways to portray them in a very poetic manner.  He inspired me somewhat to keep in mind that political art is possible.  Its weird because coming out of high school I was very political and following the leaders of the U.S. and keeping up on many different issues concerning Amnesty International.  But since entering college I've lost a lot of it.  I guess Jaar reminds me that there is something out there to speak about and a way to do it. 


Gomez-Pena

From what I saw I really like Gomez's work.  I think I responded to it so much just because its so interesting.  The whole visual aspect and the interaction between viewers, it kept me very entertained.  Though I wonder if keeping me entertained in a work of art like this is a good or a bad thing.  As in am I just viewing his Temple of Confessions as something to gawk at and then miss the point of it all?  Of course I recognize the message and different things he is trying to say, but I do wonder.  
 

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Reading D.J. Martinez 374, W. Gu 295

D.J. Martinez
 
Starting out questions:
1.  Is he a primarily political artist?
2.  What's going on with the piece saying "I Can't Imagine Ever Wanting To Be White."
3.  Did he place the piece Quality of Life in front of a U.S. flag on purpose?



Ending Questions:
1.  How did he get so far in the art world coming out of such a trapped cycle life style?
2. How does he feel about the current immigration rights controversy in Arizona? 
3.  What is his recent work?


W. Gu

Starting out questions:
1.  First off, whats the message with the tampons?
2.  Very similar but what is happening in Oedipus Refound #3:  Beyond joy and sin?
3.  What is this artist's concept for their works?

Ending Questions:
1.  Does Gu realize that the bodily items he uses to unite humans (like semen, menstral blood, and placenta) are items that actually repulse humans?
2.  Do humans ever look at his work and actually think, wow, we all menstrate that means we are connected?
3.  How does he think impregnating multiple women around the world and leaving them to raise a child without a father or child support is a good or artistic idea?

Class Nov. 10th & 15th

I'm passionate about a lot of things in my life right now.  For one I'm a vegetarian who would like to see a change in the meat industry in many areas including mass waste production, animal cruelty, and a change in the hormones/steroids they use in meats.  Also growing up I was very involved in Amnesty International and Save Darfur, mainly concentrating on the areas of refugee law, immigrant rights, and genocide in Burma and Darfur.  However I must admit after my best friend died I completely broke away from all of these things for about a year when I was adjusting.  But now I'm coming out of that and I'm feeling more passionate these days wanting to make a change.


Class on November 10th left me paired up with Arielle on the topic of child abuse in group homes or something related to the matter.  Another topic that I feel pretty strongly about.  I never would have thought of it though for a project, so I'm excited in a way.  At first we had a very clear idea on what we would do, visit a group home she's very familiar with and give a presentation.  Though after class this past Monday I'm questioning it.  Especially after seeing Gomez-Pena's Temple of Confessions and hearing Jennifer Walace speak.

I think I want to do more of a performance piece.  Maybe centered around the cycle children and teens often get stuck in when they enter group homes.  A very close friend of mine growing up went in and out of group homes with her brother.  I constantly saw the effects on her as she was shuffled around into homes she didn't want to go.  Her brother had more extreme reactions to it.  I remember him running away all the way from Texas back to Fayetteville, NC.  Of course he was thrown into juvi once he was caught, but its extremes like that, that sound off an alarm that something isn't right in the system.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Red String



Red String is a short film about making a path.  Connecting to nature.  And taking what is not ours.

When I was in 10th grade one of my friends went missing.  It wasn't until my freshman year of college her remains were found in a wooded area back in my hometown.  From there I developed a type of phobia of woods.  Of what I could find, or the people who might be lurking in them.

When we started this project the first thing we covered was safety.  A fellow classmate shared an experience about a flasher in Reedy Creek Park.  I reflected on all of the scary things I used to find at a wooded park back in my hometown.  Once my brother and I found shredded clothes, another time we heard crazy screams for help, another time a duck that had been ripped apart by what looked like hands.  It was a park where a woman pushing her child in a swing was stabbed to death by a stranger, and it was a place I was warned not to go alone.

So when this project began those two aspect came to mind.  Another thing that came to mind was how these things happen, how they are allowed to, and how we deal with it.  One thing was our connection to nature.  Its been said time after time, but it seems these days we are disconnected.  We are disensitized through the hundreds of images we see a day.  Our thoughts are peversed to think things are okay when they really shouldn't be just because it happens so often.

In the film Red String I make a path with red string.  I drive.  I follow the path the string leads me to.  I witness something disturbing with the string over, and over again.  I come to notice nature.  I change the outcome of the disturbing string.  I pick up what is not mine.  I show an image of what happened and then change it at the end. 

These actions are both of the victim and the peverse.  Leaving a path to retrace it for safety.  Drive to forget, to get away, to get to a place.  Following a path to follow someone else.  Following a path that is supposed to be safe.  Seeing what someone else has done and becoming horrified.  Seeing what you yourself have done and being horrified.  Notice nature.  Connecting with nature in the park.  Taking what is not yours.  Changing what has happened in your mind.  Changing what you have done in your mind.  Replaying it over and over again until it seems normal....

I feel like I get hung up on these subjects in my artworks.  It was supposed to be an installation project in the park and somehow my project turned into dealing with some twisted mindsets.  I'm glad I am finally formulating them somewhat, but I hope I'm not missing the point of the class assignments. 

In the end I can't even tell you if the film is saying connecting to nature will heal us or if we'll still be in danger.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Chris Burden

Wow, Burden's work was pretty interesting to say the least.  When the movie first started I didn't want to give the guy much credit.  I first learned about him with his shot in the arm stunt and didn't think much of him.  The college art world (at least to me) if filled way too much with "shock value art" and artists trying to stand out so they do whatever they think hasn't been done yet or would really shake viewers.  To me your first thought in art making shouldn't be, what hasn't been done yet?  Or I'm going to make an art piece that shocks everyone!  It should be more of what you feel or about a message you want to portray... but then again, thats all my opinion.

But as the movie progressed past calling Chris Burden a genius scientist (which I thought was ridiculous) and actually showed and explained more of his work, he slowly grew on me.  I understood more of the scientist comment after seeing him do problem solving type activities associated with his artwork.  How he explained his piece with the nickles with the matches on top was a cheap way to make it work but then quickly assuring the camera man that wasn't the main reason why he used them made me giggle.  Definitely an interesting character.

Red String

 While trying to think of how to go about my project I decided to just get out into Reedy Creek park and do some walking.  I brought my video camera and some red string with an idea in mind, but honestly what I ended up with is not what I expected.

Professor Rothrock left a few questions and comments on my last post.  She pointed out that the topics were heavy and questioned how I'd touch upon them.  Suggesting symbolism and sounds. 
As I arrived to the park I immediately noticed the sound of leaves and gravel crunching underneath my car.  The wind was also very active assisting that sound.

I drove around for a while looking for a good spot to start.  I found one near the Nature Center with a large rock marking the entrance to a trail.

I took my roll of red string and left a piece in my car and just started walking towards the trail.  My idea was kind of like Hansel and Gretel and how they left a trail so they could find their way back.  The story touches upon child abduction and not trusting strangers so I thought it would be a good touch point.

 After leaving a trail of string throughout the park I ended up finding a spot where I wanted to weave my main installation.  I started with a simple weave with spaces inbetween.  (The photo to the left was after I walked back to the car and retraced my steps the second time, collecting all of the string and finally hanging it up in the tree.  The simple weave will be seen in the film.)

My idea with the path of string points to the Hansel and Gretel story, our connection to disconnection, and for me memory.  I will expand upon these ideas the more I work.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Pre-Environmental Project

I'm not entirely clear on what I will do for my project.  I know for tomorrow I will bring my video camera and SLR along with a roll of red and black string.  In the beginning I wanted to do something with people.  Maybe gathering as many friends and participants as possible and bring them out to demonstrate numbers.  But now I'm changing my mind.  I also had the idea of touching upon the idea of missing persons.  Since the finding of my friend's remains in a wooded area I've had a bit of a fear of woods.  Or rather a fear of what I might find there.  Paired up with you can't walk through heavily wooded areas anymore without the risk of being abducted or bothered, its something I want to talk about.  I don't want the project to be depressing in any way, maybe just a comment on the fact that this happens or why as humans we allow it.


Below are stats taken off of MissingKids.com

The U.S. Department of Justice reports

-  797,500 children (younger than 18) were reported missing in a one-year period of time studied resulting in an average of 2,185 children being reported missing each day.
-  203,900 children were the victims of family abductions.
-  58,200 children were the victims of non-family abductions.
-  115 children were the victims of “stereotypical” kidnapping. (These crimes involve someone the child does not know or someone of slight acquaintance, who holds the child overnight, transports the child 50 miles or more, kills the child, demands ransom, or intends to keep the child permanently.)
Its disturbing in many ways.  I also wanted to use this in relation to the park and a nature area because I somewhat feel like we need to get back to nature to heal us of this perverse problem.  Purely my opinion, but I feel that we've become so detached, so disensitized while living in a society ruled by images, that its no wonder some of us have lost touch and gone bonkers enough to abduct a child or commit a vicious crime.  Of course its not entirely that easy to chalk it up to that, but I do feel like its a contributing factor.  If we could get back to nature, notice while walking the sound of the rustling grass or crunching leaves rather than the music we are blasting on our Ipods, cherish the fact that we can still feel the cool biting breeze rather than ignore it and hurry to the heated building.  Enjoy digging in the dirt again like we did when we were kids.  I think it would help heal many of our problems.

Even if I don't address the missing persons issue, maybe I'll address the disconnection problem I think we all face or have faced at one time...

Christo and Jeanne Claude

Hm, what to say about the umbrellas.  The idea was definitely a visionary one.  Aesthetically they were beautiful in a way, definitely making the landscapes they graced something to take a double look at, but I have to question if they were worth it.  Two lives were lost, many teams of hard workers had to put them up, take them down, try to put them back up in storms, take them back down, etc, and many on the team were treated horrible by Cristo and Jeanne.  Now I will acknowledge that everyone volunteered for it and probably had an idea for what they were getting into, but it was a lot of trouble it seemed.

I really would like to know if the documentary just made Jeanne seem that self centered and maniac like.  A lot of moments he was captured in was not a good light for him.  But I've never met him so what kind of judgement can I pass...

The project just took so much time, energy and even lives.  I would like to know if the artists felt it was worth it.  If the viewers thought it was worth it....

Andy Goldsworthy film

To me Goldsworthy is a type of crazy genius.  But when I say crazy, I literally mean he's a bit off.  But thats not a bad thing to me.  I think he thinks in a way most of us don't, and the creations he comes up with because of it are fantastic.  The way he made his ice sculptures from hand and didn't use gloves amazed me.  This is stating the obvious but ice is cold, it hurts terribly when you hold it for a while, so the fact that he would continuously touch it and mold it for his artistic vision, I have to give him props.  I think thats why when I read about Shuckman's work and saw how it was written intensely in his favor I was a bit turned off.  Comparing Shuckman to Goldsworthy put Shuckman in an odd light. 

Goldsworthy continuously goes out and makes artwork that many people see and critic, but he just does it because its his artistic vision.  (Or at least thats why I think he does it.)  Shuckman kind of shies away, catering to one person and only focusing on that person.  Feeding his one and only audience with the terms he wants them to use, almost brainwashing him with an idea of how great the work is.  Am I becoming too harsh on this one?  Let me back off and go research Shuckman so I'm not a complete jerk about him.

Skip Schuckman and Besty Damon

Skip Schuckman p. 34

Beginning Questions:
1.  Does he do all of these pieces by himself?  Does he have any help?
2.  Does all of his artwork take place outside in nature like Goldsworthy does?
3.  How did he get those stones to stay in the cave like piece?
4.  Are all of his materials from nature?

Ending Questions:
1.  What other projects has he done?
2.  Has his style/artistic vision changed at all with the ongoing years?
3.  Is he a bit self delusional?


Besty Damon p. 356

Beginning Questions:
1.  From the photos it looks like she does wide scale outside pieces.  Are they related to landscape in any way?
2.  What medium did she start out with?
3.  Does any of her projects touch upon addressing environmental issues?

Ending Questions:
1.  Is she somehow involved in all of Keepers of the Waters projects?
2.  I ask this a lot, but what has she been working on lately?  Has she made any advances in her artwork that she really likes?
3.  How does she fit into the U.S. art world?  (As in do many people know her in the art community and acknowledge her as an artist?)